24 On My 24th

Yet another blog post not about teaching. They're coming- I promise.

 

Twenty four things that I am grateful for as another year of life begins.

1. Good health. God has brought me out of a dark place. Life is much different and I am so thankful.

2. Family. I am so blessed to live close to much of my family, and that makes me so happy. I am an hour away from seeing Cinderella with my Mom and sisters, and neighbors with my second Mom and Dad. 

3. My dog. You don’t understand that I own the cutest dog ever. In the world. And I love coming home to his goofy, tail-wagging, slobbery self every day. He makes me smile when I feel so far from happy.

4. God’s word and His promises. Where my words fail, His do not. Though I am full of doubt, sadness, and fear, his mercies are new every morning. May His words replace my own.

5. My job. Though it can be SO stressful, I know it’s only because I care about it so much. I am thankful for principals that back me up, coworkers that help me out, and kids that adore me even on my worst days. They make it all possible.

6. My kids. They have a part of my heart, even though they drive me crazy sometimes. But when I drive around town- it is their faces I look for on sidewalks, bikes, or roads. I scan newspapers and websites for their names or their families. I spend my money on them and things for them all the time. I leave work and talk about them- the funny things they said, problems I am trying to solve with them, great things that they did. I worry and I pray and I would give my life for any of them, good day or bad day.

7. Arkansas. I live in a beautiful state, surrounded by beautiful trees and flowers. Though I don’t like the bugs, I have a great view so much of the time.

8. Creativity. Though I am not as great as some, God has given me a sprinkling of this. It makes me good at my job. It fills bored moments with projects and ideas. 

9. My church. It has been several years since I have truly had a church family to call home. During that time, things happened that made us both untrusting and burnt out. So I am thankful to now belong to a church family that is different from any other I have encountered, in a good way. And I like that they let me hold babies, arrange large stacks of wood, and throw 80’s parties sometimes.

10. Books. I am thankful for a love of reading that has never faded. I am thankful that I get to spend my days buying and reading books for my kids, and for myself. And I am thankful for another world to slip into when mine just seems too crazy.

11. Jellybeans. Because that’s what I’m eating right now.

12. Instagram. This year I was able to start an Instagram account specifically about teaching. Over 700 followers later, I am grateful to be a part of a growing community of teachers online that share ideas, products, and encouragement with one another. What a joy it is to have access to all these other people that “get” it.

13. And on that note, Teachers Pay Teachers. Though I don’t make millions (I wish, right?), I love sharing the things I make for my classroom and helping other teachers out. And that little payout I get once in a while helps fund my purse/shoe addiction. 

14. Weekends and holidays. Because I need them and the sleep they give me.

15. Change. Even though it’s scary and annoying sometimes, I like a good adventure. God keeps us on our toes.

16. Pinterest. From last minute dinner ideas to parties and school projects, it’s a lifesaver. It’s my favorite mix of dreams and reality. 

17. Words. God’s words. Other peoples’ words. Sometimes mine. That God would give us brains to arrange words into beautiful songs and sentences is beyond amazing to me. 

18. Pictures. Because sometimes it’s good to look back.

19. Friends. There was a time in my life where I couldn’t really say that I had any close ones. So I am so grateful that has changed. I am thankful for friends that are family and have to put up with you. For friends that let you cry and complain and don’t make you feel bad about it. For friends that let you do crazy projects and let you be bossy and go out to eat with you. For friends that help you find a house. For friends that rant with you about work. For friends that generally like you, crazy hair, crazy life, hot mess self and all.

20. Food. Need I say more?

21. Road trips. Long drives piled in the car. Making up stupid new lyrics for Taylor Swift songs. Listening to podcasts. Complaining about the big fat dog baby in my lap. Keeping each other awake. Driving through darkness feeling like the only people in the world.

22. Music. My constant background noise. My escape. My long shower-taking companion. My get-pumped-up-for-work songs. My point me back to Jesus times of worship. 

23. Josh Samuel. Husband, friend, bossy-pants, forever love. Who buys me flowers and books. Who tells me to hurry up when I’m running late (all the time). Who takes me to church and Target and to see my family. Who lets me hold babies and talk about ten year olds all the time. Who buys me Disney movies and records HGTV for me. Who lets me sleep in and stay up late. Who makes me feel pretty and loved and makes me laugh more than anyone I have ever known. You are my everything on earth.

24. Grace. Without which I could not be here, typing this. His love knows no bounds and I am nothing without it. I am whiny and impatient and doubtful. But He never leaves me, only loves me. That is word-taking, mind-blowing wonderful.

Here's to 24 blessed years and hopefully, more.

 

Why I'm Only Making One New Year's Resolution This Year

Hello all! I am basking in the glow of winter break. So much so that I am even blogging. Crazy right? I'm here today to get personal with you again and talk about why this year, in 2015, I'm only making one New Year's Resolution.

Yep, just one. 

This year I am resolving to do this one thing better- faith.

Let me start from the beginning.

I'm typing this at 1:30 in the morning. I slept in too late this morning (oh how I love winter break) and can't fall asleep. So naturally, my brain starts to bring up all of the things. You know, the things. The list of "Things That Are Currently Going Wrong In My Life That Need To Be Fixed Right Away". Those things. So here come the questions...Why me? Why can't I have that? When is that going to happen for me? Why can't I be happy all the time? Blah blah blah. The usual.

But this time, something stopped me ("Hello, God here!"). I started thinking about my hand. It was stretched out across the bed, just where my fingertips could touch my husband's arm. He doesn't notice. He's sleeping like a rock over there. But sometimes, like this time, I just want to reach out and know that he's there. And God reminded me in that moment that He keeps his promises. 

I didn't date in high school. I didn't date until college. And it killed me, as many things do at that age. Anything that set me apart from what I thought was "normal" or "cool" or "expected" was literally the end of the world. I spent countless nights asking God the same thing over and over- Why me? What's wrong with me? When is it going to happen for me?

When I think back on those days, I am heartbroken all over again. But for different reasons. First, I would tell myself to get it together and put on some makeup. Because I needed it. But then I would grab myself by the shoulders and shake me and say, "If only you knew what I know now! If only you could see what God's going to do for you!" 

And don't you know that's exactly what God is saying to me everytime my insomniac mind brings up my laundry list of problems? In the midst of my whining He is dying to shake me and say, "If only you knew what I know! If only you could see what's going to happen next!"

I met my husband during my sophomore year of college. I was honestly just around the corner from all that God had for me. But I was letting my selfish thoughts blind my faith. So often I let a bad case of the "why me's" get the best of me.

So let my husband (who was and is more than I could have ever imagined myself deserving and a million times better than high school boys I might add)- let all the countless blessings that surround me- be my constant reminder that God is a promise keeper. While I am whining my life away, He is waiting and ready to reveal to me a plan that is so much more wonderful than my small, human mind can imagine. Through my most broken moments (though there are may more to come I am sure), God has brought and will bring me joy.

 I only need faith to see it.

And that, my friends, is my New Year's Resolution for 2015. To live by faith, and not by my stupid, selfish, go-to-sleep-it's-one-in-the-morning sight ;)

"Pure gold put in the fire comes out of it proved pure; genuine faith put through this suffering comes out proved genuine. When Jesus wraps this all up, it's your faith, not your gold, that God will have on display as evidence of his victory." 1 Peter 1:7 (MSG)

"Immediately Jesus reached out his hand and caught him. "You of little faith," he said, "why did you doubt?" Matthew 14:31 (NIV)

"It's what we trust in but don't yet see that keeps us going." 2 Corinthians 5:7 (MSG)

     
P.S. - God keeps lots of promises in my life (and yours). This is just one special example :)